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How To Overcome Denial


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Us humans deal with distress in various ways. If you are struggling to accept something that feels stressful or overwhelming, you might be going through denial.

Denial is a natural response to pain and stress. It is a common coping mechanism that gives us time to deal with a grievous situation. It’s possible to be in denial about anything - financial losses, illness, relationship problems, or even addiction. 

When I lost a close one, it became difficult for me to come to terms with this new reality. I avoided the facts and chose to completely ignore the evidence that the close one has indeed departed this life. 

This led me to unknowingly suppress my emotions so that I didn’t have to deal with the painful truth. Even though this initial response was valid, eventually, I had to accept and face reality to move on.

Here are a few things I did to overcome denial:

#1 Be Open To Suggestions: Often the advice of others may seem unreasonable when you are in denial. It may even sound offensive if you are not ready to heal yet. 

However, even if other people’s ideas might be very different from yours, it won’t hurt to hear them out. Allow new opinions and perspectives into your awareness bubble, even if you have no intention of changing views.

#2 Confront Problems: When your emotional security is threatened, it becomes difficult to face the challenge. Our fears and insecurities create a blanket over our eyes to keep us safe from pain in stressful moments. But, the harsh truth is that you cannot avoid the situation forever. 

I try to confront problems by attempting to examine my thoughts and behaviors surrounding the stresses of my life. I ask myself, “Why am I afraid to face this?” 

#3 Journaling: Be expressive in private if you cannot face people at the moment. Journaling is the perfect way to discuss your feelings with yourself. It also helps to write down the consequences of not dealing with this problem. 

For example, if you avoid dealing with a health condition, give yourself a concrete picture of the outcome of this neglect. A reminder like - “If you continue to dismiss this illness, it might worsen vital organs” can motivate you to acknowledge the issue and take action.

#4 Seek Counselling: Therapy sessions with a licensed professional will help you navigate through the issues you haven’t been able to face yet. Also, counseling will help uncover deep-rooted anxieties and fears which have contributed to being in denial. 

We have all been in denial at some point of our lives. What steps did you take to overcome denial?

 

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I think the hardest part about being in denial of something is living in a different perception from other people around you. Some people will echo you and make you feel like the right one or the same one but when other people point things out, it can be a hard pill to swallow! 

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On 9/30/2021 at 7:14 PM, Ella said:

I think the hardest part about being in denial of something is living in a different perception from other people around you. Some people will echo you and make you feel like the right one or the same one but when other people point things out, it can be a hard pill to swallow! 

I have a friend who was in denial of her addition. She was a gambler. She played the lotto and bought scratch off tickets almost daily. When casinos started opening up in our area, she was going once a week, then twice a week... And it just got worse from there. When I told her I think she had a problem she would always say "so and so said I don't!" or she would say "I am not as bad as so and so!". She ended up getting help when the lockdowns started because she realized how addicted she was. 

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On 10/1/2021 at 9:43 PM, Sophia said:

I have a friend who was in denial of her addition. She was a gambler. She played the lotto and bought scratch off tickets almost daily. When casinos started opening up in our area, she was going once a week, then twice a week... And it just got worse from there. When I told her I think she had a problem she would always say "so and so said I don't!" or she would say "I am not as bad as so and so!". She ended up getting help when the lockdowns started because she realized how addicted she was. 

I heat some stories like this. People getting help for addictions during lockdown. I guess there was some upsides to it all. I also heard the opposite though, people's addictions became worse. I hope she is doing better now with things opening back up.

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