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How To Overcome Commitment Issues


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To begin with, who doesn’t long for a “happily ever after” kind of love? Of course, everyone! Candlelight dinners, late nights heart-to-heart conversations, holding hands, and caring for each other, everything seems to be perfect until the word commitment walks in. 

If you find it difficult to commit to a particular person, then you most likely suffer from commitment issues. The commitment phobia isn’t something unreal. Abusive relationships, failed marriages, disloyal exes, anything can lead to commitment phobia. 

Fear isn’t a bad thing. If you fear snakes, spiders, or scorpions and run away from them, you’re doing the right thing. But, running away from love, intimacy, and emotional vulnerability is a foolish thing! 

It’s time you sit down with your fears. The road to overcoming commitment issues isn’t an easy ride. And this is why I say it is better to acknowledge the fact that you’re going through commitment issues rather than denying them. Instead of running away from the truth, sit and make peace with your feelings. 

Here’s my advice on how to overcome commitment issues:

#1 Figure out if you really want a relationship: Relationship anxiety is a real thing. And if you’re dating someone, think of the reasons why you’re dating them. Ask yourself whether you’re dating for a “happily ever after” kind of thing or is it just another fling. 

If it’s just another fling, I suggest you stop right away. But, if you think you’ve found that perfect person, then get over all the fears and take the plunge. Jump into the rabbit hole and explore the depths of love. 

#2 Communicate honestly with your partner: Talk, talk and talk - this is what I keep telling people. Your partner isn’t capable of reading minds, and they don’t know the battle and conflicts going on within you. This is why you must be honest with them. 

Let them know your thoughts and feelings and, if possible, communicate to them your fears. If you have a dark past or have ever been in an abusive relationship, share with them. It will help them to understand you better. 

 #3 Wipe out the past and forget the future: This is my favorite mantra in life. When thinking about life, wipe out the past from your head, and don’t even think about the future. And, when it comes to people you love and care about, don’t let your dark past or blank future meddle with your present. Take one day at a time, and just like that, you’ll conquer everything. 

Have you had commitment issues? What steps did you take to overcome them? 

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On 9/27/2021 at 8:12 PM, Stacey said:

Commitment issues can be tough because a lot of people who struggle with them don't want to look at themselves as the problem. They like to blame the people they date. These are some really honest and straightforward tips though that I can agree with 100%!

I know a few people who do this. They always blame the guys they date but never consider that they are dating the wrong guys themselves. I think they use it as an excuse because they don't want to miss out on someone that can be better. 

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On 9/29/2021 at 11:10 AM, Emma said:

I know a few people who do this. They always blame the guys they date but never consider that they are dating the wrong guys themselves. I think they use it as an excuse because they don't want to miss out on someone that can be better. 

Absolutely. I had a friend like this when I was in college. She loved being in relationships but she would always look for excuses to get out of them the second someone new was interested in her because she wanted to be with the new guy. I think they call these types cereal daters. 

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On 10/5/2021 at 7:46 PM, Stacey said:

Absolutely. I had a friend like this when I was in college. She loved being in relationships but she would always look for excuses to get out of them the second someone new was interested in her because she wanted to be with the new guy. I think they call these types cereal daters. 

I remember hearing that term a long time ago on some kind of dating show on MTV!! That is such a perfect term for people like this. It is like they can't just stick with one person long enough, they need something fresh and new all the time. 

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On 10/10/2021 at 12:23 PM, Yonder said:

Very tough subject to approach, especially in terms of relationships because every person may see their idea of commitment differently.

For sure! And to some people, something as simple as being on time could be viewed as too much of a commitment. It really needs to be reflected on the individual and their needs within the relationship and the willingness of the partner to understand. Dating the right person for you makes a world of difference! 

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