My neighbor is so nosy!

[Ella]

The one neighbor I have is very nosy to the point where I don't even like having people over. She is a middle-aged woman who seemingly knows every time something is happening or going to happen and tries to invite herself. On more than one occasion, she had gotten Amazon packages for me and then knocked at my door. If I didn't answer, she would take them back to her house and call me to tell me she had it. I don't like being mean but it really gets under my skin that she is like this. I don't know how to nicely tell her to mind her own business and stop touching me stuff and inviting herself when she wants. I think she is very lonely or something. 

[James]

Sometimes there is no easy way to have the uncomfortable conversation that is about to happen. 

Most of us do not like conflict so these are the exact situations that we avoid but once it starts annoying us enough we have to set guidelines. 

Sometimes though we think there is going to be conflict but then there does not end up being any and a clear expectation can get set. 

Dealing with neighbors can be a pain but the first step is having that conversation. 

Just try to stay calm, don't make it sound like you are bossing them around, and let them know the things that are bugging you in as polite of a way as you can. I hope the talk goes well. 

[Mila]

My sister's neighbor was kind of like this. She lived in an apartment though. She got to the point where she was willing to move just to avoid talking to her about the issues. Her son ended up showing up one day and he apologized to her without her even complaining because he knew how his mother was and he said that he is going to have a talk with her if she has any issues. She told him what was going on, he talked to her, and the issue was resolved. Don't let stuff like this go. It is not worth being unhappy in your own space over. 

[Stacey]

You are going to have to do something about this. The fact that she is taking your property into her house against your wishes is actually a felony in some states! That is considered to be like mail and you don't touch other people's mail!

I would have likely blown up by now. You seem like you are the kind of person to implode though. So you have to be careful. Bottled all that stress, biting your tongue, and just dealing with it doesn't make the issue go away!

[Rachel]

On 6/22/2021 at 5:49 PM, Ella said:

The one neighbor I have is very nosy to the point where I don't even like having people over. She is a middle-aged woman who seemingly knows every time something is happening or going to happen and tries to invite herself. On more than one occasion, she had gotten Amazon packages for me and then knocked at my door. If I didn't answer, she would take them back to her house and call me to tell me she had it. I don't like being mean but it really gets under my skin that she is like this. I don't know how to nicely tell her to mind her own business and stop touching me stuff and inviting herself when she wants. I think she is very lonely or something. 

Your best bet is to just let her know how it is. Explain you don't like your packages being taken off of your porch or property. And just say you'll eventually get to it, and thank her for the help in the past. 

Honestly, sometimes being honest is best. I just tell someone I have things to do. Since I work from home anyway, it's a good excuse to end a convo earlier. 

[Ella]

I am going to have a talk with her today when she gets back from church. I feel she will be in her best mindset for me to talk to her about this. I just can't keep going on like this. You all all right on that. Thanks for the advice and feedback!