Could you ever forgive someone who did something awful to you?

[StanleyZEN]

Forgiveness can be a powerful thing. It can help people move forward and give them closure sometimes. But, could you ever forgive someone who did something awful to you or someone you know? Maybe they are a murderer and murdered someone you cared about. Would you ever be able to forgive someone like that? 

I honestly don't think I could forgive someone if, say they killed someone I cared a lot about. There's no way I could give them forgiveness, because I think I'd rather them be dead than be forgiven. I know some people are stronger than myself, and can forgive someone for awful things, but I can't. If you do something to my family, then I will never forgive you. And yeah, maybe that's not healthy, but idk what else to say. 

[Emma]

I think the concept of forgiveness heavily relies on one's ability to accept change and move forward. Most people have a hard time with change and this is why breaking someone's trust is so impactful. I believe I can forgive people of evil or awful things but this would require me to cut them from my life completely. I wouldn't be able to have them in my life at all. In your example, I think it would take a long time of healing and prayer before I could forgive someone of murder but I believe I could eventually get there. 

[James]

There are some things in my mind that can not be forgiven. Murder would be one of those things. Regardless of who the person was. 

Forgiveness is the first step of the process to rebuilding trust and there are some things that can be forgiven. Sometimes people make bad choices and as long as they are not making the same bad choice over and over again there may be room to forgive. If there is a pattern of behavior I would need to see a person change for years to begin the process all over again.  

I hold grudges for a long time (something I have been trying to work on) so forgiveness is not one of those things that come easily for me. I have learned mistakes are made and I do not get as angry as I used to when I was younger as now I understand when people are learning. It's the patterns I look for now to understand if someone is trustworthy or not. 

[Ella]

I always thought of forgiveness as being a thing that is deserved but the older I have gotten, the more I have realized forgiveness is more for yourself than the other person. It is viewed as an act of kindness and strength in many cases but I view it as neither of those things. I think it is more about self love than anything. So for me, yes I would be able to forgive someone, anyone but it would take me some time.